Fun Sunday-Say it with a limerick

Say it with a Limerick

A limerick is a kind of a witty, humorous, or nonsense poem,[1] especially one in five-line anapestic or amphibrachic meter with a strict rhyme scheme (AABBA), which is sometimes obscene with humorous intent. The form can be found in England as of the early years of the 18th century.[2] It was popularized by Edward Lear in the 19th century, although he did not use the term.

The following example of a limerick is of unknown origin:
The limerick packs laughs anatomical
In space that is quite economical,
But the good ones I’ve seen
So seldom are clean,
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

Gershon Legman, who compiled the largest and most scholarly anthology, held that the true limerick as a folk form is always obscene, and cites similar opinions by Arnold Bennett and George Bernard Shaw,[3] describing the clean limerick as a periodic fad and object of magazine contests, rarely rising above mediocrity. From a folkloric point of view, the form is essentially transgressive; violation of taboo is part of its function.

Source

I was chatting with my daughter this evening and she asked me if I knew that January 23, 2012 is supposed to be the most depressing day of this year. I did not know that and I was skeptical so I googled it and sure enough, there it was. I expect some of us have been getting a little practice in these long winter days in the depression department. So why not join me and have some fun today and let tomorrow take care of itself.

There was a young girl from St Paul
Who wore a newspaper dress to a ball
The dress caught on fire
And burned her entire
Front page, sport’s section and all.

There was a young woman from Mass.
Who had a magnificent ass
Not round and pink
As you probably think
But gray, had long ears and ate grass.

Please do not take the limericks seriously. It is all in jest. Mainstreamfair.

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49 Responses to Fun Sunday-Say it with a limerick

  1. A poet, I’m not, can’t you guess?
    Dammit, I’m trying to impress
    You folks with my wit
    So don’t get in a snit
    Now let’s see you make your own mess.

    Author-Snoop

  2. Amber from Maryland says:

    Hi Snoopy

    It is nice to have some humor to distract us from the Felon Anthony situation and our annoyance with the good Dr. Ablow.

  3. Amber~ ~then we will ridicule them with limericks.

  4. A woman worked with judges and such
    As a volunteer so didn’t make much
    But instead of a check
    His honor gave her a peck
    Then beat her over the head with his crutch

    Now she’s lying hurt on the floor
    Sayin’ for you, I’m working no more
    And would you believe
    She ran home to Steve
    Who was waiting for her at the door.

    Author-Snoop (dedicated to Vicky)

  5. A young lady from sunny CA
    Always wanted a roll in the hay
    But oh what a pity
    She lived in the city
    And could only dream of the day.

    She packed all her things in the car
    To the country, it wasn’t that far
    Down the highway she went
    She sure was hell bent
    As she puffed away on her cigar

    In the distance she spotted a farm
    She figured she’d cause no one harm
    The barn seemed a bit ratty
    And so did Patti
    When she set off a bloody alarm.

    The shot gun was aimed at her head
    The barrel was filled with the lead
    But the gun did misfire
    And blew out her tire
    Now Cali’s back home in her bed.

    Author-Snoop (dedicated to Cali Patti)

  6. LindaNewYork says:

    The girl got away with murder
    The courts could’nt go any further
    We’d like to say
    Please go away
    We still believe you are a murderer.

  7. Amber from Maryland says:

    Good job, Linda!!!

  8. LindaNewYork~~very nice and so true…

  9. margaret says:

    Very Good Linda and Snoops !!!! Snoops left a message in cafe 3. Everyone have a great day…

  10. Bobbie says:

    I love your witty poems. Certainly keeps the blues away 🙂

  11. Thank you, Bobbie. I wonder how many people stocked up on Kleenex for Monday….bwahhhh

  12. cali patti says:

    om*… As I sat here reading your post, smiling ear to ear like the idiot I apparently have become I was recalling my original attraction to you and your writing. I thought how bright your light shined with your wit and intelligence being a beacon of humor, way back, when the blogosphere was filled with disfunction. I was plotting my tribute to the Northern Lady I so admired. I even wrote a quick not to an Aussie Lady to ck out the wit at Snoopy’s.
    Then… I read my, my, my (yes, I’m stuttering) dedicated Limerick.

    Why, Oh Why, didn’t I get my roll in the hay?
    So unfair … Bet if I was Canadian born you would have been more generous with the roll in the hay.

    Seriously, Thank you very much for this post, I am sad today and you have put a smile on my face.

  13. LindaNewYork says:

    Coming to you from work…

    I have to say I AM a little bummed today! LOL

    Lousy, ugly,cold rainy weather, (snowed on Saturday) lousy things going on in my life for a while!

  14. Cali~~ I probably had more fun writing that limerick for you than you did in reading it. LOL

  15. LindaNewYork ~~ hang in there. Only eight more days and we can say goodbye to this month. I hear the folks in Alabama must be feeling depressed today with the tornados. Two deaths and over 100 injured and so many homes totally destroyed.

  16. Vicky says:

    To the poet laureate:

    There once was a grand sleuth named Snoopy
    Some found the old gal a bit loopy,
    But she had her fans
    Including me and Stan
    The rest were just full of poopy

    There now is a seagul named Jon
    Who took over for Snoops whose now gone
    This bird gets around
    I heard she was found
    Pretending a pool was a pond

    I was always lousy with limericks:)

  17. Vicky~~your limericks look good to me. They put a smile on my face and that is the idea.

    Do I dare….

    There is an old broad named Vicky
    When around Seagulls is picky
    The gull it was fed
    Then chit on her head
    The moldy bread made the gull sicky

  18. Vicky says:

    LOL!!!

    What happens in Cabo is supposed to stay in Cabo, but now that you have seen fit to bring up the subject

    A seagull flew down to Cabo
    Before leaving had quite a wobble
    Too many sips
    From the cocktails she dipped
    Her flight home was more like a hobble

  19. Cali, you asked…

    Why didn’t you get to roll in the hay?
    The farmer knew you weren’t a good lay
    You couldn’t climb on a roost
    Without a good boost
    And you can’t lay an egg to this day.

  20. I met an old girl in Cabo
    Was she sober or drunk, I don’t know
    I took her abuse
    ‘Cause I’m a gull not a goose
    And she sounded like an old crow.

    She made the other folks howl
    As she let me perch on her towel
    She sure had a fit
    When she noticed I chit
    Her crumby bread caused a loose bowel.

  21. Vicky says:

    Seagull, You never cease to amaze and amuse me!
    Even Steve got a big chuckle out of that one, and it isn’t easy to make him laugh. He’s such a serious soul. He usually just shakes his head at our antics. 🙂

  22. LindaNewYork says:

    You gals are good with the limericks!!!

  23. Happy Birthday Red Relaxed
    ….I baked this cake just for you…

  24. redrelaxed says:

    Good morning Snoopy & all!

    Thank you, thank you and thank you! The cake and song are just fantastic!

    I have been enjoying the limericks on this day (which ISN’T the most depressing day of the year by 24 hours…lol) and giggling. Aren’t you all so clever!

    Here goes…

    The term “elderly” isn’t the word,
    For Red, no, that’s much too absurd.
    Though my birthday’s today,
    If you asked, I would say,
    The word “youngster” is greatly preferred.

    Cheers!
    ~Red

  25. Hi Red, well I see that you are great with limericks… your meter is right on the mark. I hope you have a wonderful day. It is foggy here now in the east. It went from -14C yesterday morning to +7C with rain today. Yes, my dear, you are a youngster and a very nice one at that. Hugs!

  26. cali patti says:

    OMG… the Cabo remarks were hilarious. My husband just returned from Cabo, Armonia Spa with his newest fling. Yes, you read what I wrote correctly. In about 18 months I will be free until then humor & walking is getting me thru this. He actually picked me up a needed item, not gift from the duty free shop there. OMG, really, really!! He does not have clue. Yes, I married this idiot.
    At times it is like living in la la land. My husband goes on vacation with his girlfriend and buys his wife a gift, sort of. Go ahead ladies laugh, it is what I am left with and it works.
    NO pity or sad, I am done with that and humor is my remedy. Jokes only!

  27. cali patti says:

    Come on mainstreanfair, give me a limerick! I was sad for years but I honestly see the humor in my situation. This man has become a complete moron. I am looking forward to my freedom. There is a reason for the the 18 months but that too serious. I think buying your wife a gift while on vacation with your ?? is hilarious.
    Snoop, if you want to delete my comments feel free. I know that many women will not see the humor in this, it took me a few years to be where I am. I would appreciate women sharing my hilarious life with me but if it is inappropriate I understand.

  28. Cali~ ~you are forcing my hand….

    Hubby purchased viagra and went off to a spa
    To thrill his new girl friend and put her in awe
    He was really a wimp
    For his thing remained limp
    The pill got caught in his throat and stiffened his jaw.

    His girlfriend was waiting in her pink negligée
    Getting quite bored with all the hubby’s delay
    And said,” what the heck
    Is wrong with your neck?”
    You better buck up or I’m on my way.

    He just remembered a present he’d bought
    For his wife back home, believe it or not
    He threw it on to the bed
    Said, “use this instead”
    But the D cells batteries he’d totally forgot.

  29. cali patti says:

    Thank you mainstreamfair … I loved it! Except the little blue pill upsets his ulcer and he then needs other meds. True. He lays in bed moans and groans. When I learned what he was doing by causing his own stomach pain I offered him eggs with Tabasco! He said I was being mean. He got that one right!

    A 68 yr old man who now goes to tanning booths, I could never make this cr** up! He tanned so much his skin turn really dark and began peeling off, even his eye lids. Left him with these white patchs and I told him he looked like M.J. Honest, he could be in one of those comedy sketchs.
    Also got his first tattoo a few years back, a wolf head. I asked him if it was to attract the local dogs. Jeeze, a tatoo at age 65.
    Ladies, my life with him has become a comedy. I never know what he will say or do next.

  30. Off Topic….

    Re Baby Lisa Irwin

    Deborah Bradley and Jeremy Irwin are going to be on the Dr Phil Show. They wont sit down separately to talk with LE and refuse to be interviewed by the media. Will Phil be paying them for their interview?

    http://news.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474981056681

    More here….

    http://www.nbcactionnews.com/dpp/news/region_missouri/northland/Baby-Lisa-Irwins-parents-tape-interview-for-Dr-Phil-talk-show

  31. Vicky says:

    Call Patti – there are times when we most humor the sub speci and there are times when we must find the humor in them. I had to giggle when I read the description of your soon to be ex. Each year you will be able to find additional humor in the fact that as he continues to age and his skin continues to droop and wrinkle, that tattoo will soon come to resemble malnourished stray dog. 🙂

  32. Karen C. says:

    Cali- I knew a guy who sounds just like your soon-to-be-Ex! Just like- the fake tan, etc. He tried to keep up with the young girls- coke when offered, wore shades inside walking into interior walls, ’bout died doing poppers on the dance floors of Boston. Glad to see how fabulously you are handling this- it IS funny, and he WILL rue the day. They almost always do!

    Here’s one:
    There once was a confabulist named Jodi
    Who treated her victim quite grody-
    She preened in her cell
    casting her spell
    But beneath she was still just a toad-y.

  33. Karen C. says:

    There once was a witch from Orlando,
    quite fixated on a dude named Lazzaro,
    to snare him she’d sin,
    her real “babe” she’d do in,
    and now he regards her as a Zero.

  34. cali patti says:

    Mainstream..I tried to do a limerick and I was awful
    Thanks Ladies, I honestly am doing just fine, now. How can I not enjoy the humor in his actions.
    A few years ago I was nagging at him about his actions. He said to me that if I really loved him then I would be happy for him, … WHAT? Really said that. La La land.
    Maybe he drank the Cindy koolade.
    I could provide the comments and events and you ladies could write the play or sit com.
    Make some money or laughs off this idiot!

  35. Karen C ~~Bravo!!! Your limerick were great.

  36. Cali~~don’t give up on the limericks. You will get the hang of it….

    Da da da da da da da da
    Da da da da da da da da
    Da da da da
    Da da da da
    Da da da da da da da da

    The last word in the first, second and last line should rhyme
    The last word in the third and fourth line should rhyme

  37. There is a man who is quite debonaire
    On his head and chest he has no hair
    His humor is droll
    Unless he’s on a roll
    Which is seldom and somewhat rare

  38. Caleb Pacheco, 3-Year-Old Sterling, Colo. Boy, Found Dead Under Trailer Home; Toddler’s Mother Accused Of Murder

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/24/caleb-pacheco-3-year-old-_n_1227579.html

  39. What is wrong with some judges? He let the 4 girls who put the beating on this other girl return to school but the District Attorney has stepped in.

    Raw Video released of 13-year-old girl brutally beaten on school bus

    http://www.wftv.com/videos/news/surveillance-brutal-ocala-bus-fight-caught-on/vFs5P/

  40. Vicky says:

    Snoops, I am at a loss of words regarding Caleb. The U.S. Child Welfare System is in serious need of a complete make over. When are they going to get a clue? It is not always in a child’s best interest to be with its parent(s)! And if they insist on reunification, then they are damn well responsible for the welfare of the child! I would love to see the social worker’s contact log.

  41. Vicky~~it is heartbreaking to think that little boy was given back to his mother who was high on meth most of the time. Nancy Grace was wild over this last night and rightfully so. He was under the trailer for over a year and mommy even put a couple of Caleb’s toys in the blanket and bag she wrapped him in after she killed him. Maybe she overdosed him on meth. They still may be able to find out if that drug was present when she wrapped him up. I agree that the Child Welfare system needs a revamping. This isn’t the first or second time that they have been derelict in their duties. I don’t think they bother to do very much investigating and to heck with the welfare of the child.

    Look at Dale Smith, ex fianceé of Michelle Parker and named prime suspect in her disappearance. The judge gave him custody of the 3 yr old twins and they lived with Michelle at her mother’s before she went missing. Dale’s parents baby sit the twins and Dale’s father just got charged with possession and growing drugs. Nice environment for the twins but Dale is the bio father. It just doesn’t make sense.

  42. Vicky says:

    Snoopy, I was dumbfounded several years back when told by a social worker for the State of Kansas, that illicit drug use by parents is not grounds for removing a child from the home. When called in for a child welfare check, as long as there are no visible signs of abuse, food in the cabinet (only 1 meals worth required) running water, and heat, if the parents aren’t passed out cold (and that doesn’t matter if the child is able to answer questions regarding safety) their drug use is not an issue.
    Where I work, the case managers make every effort to schedule appointments with many parents between noon and 3:00. That way they can catch them after they have slept and before they are high. These same parents can’t figure out why their child has behavioral health issues. It just blows my mind.

  43. Dashcam captures initial rush after baby Lisa reported missing

    http://www.kctv5.com/story/16612025/dashcam-baby-lisa

  44. LindaNewYork says:

    Hi Jonathin and all!
    I am in the middle of reading something I thought you might find interesting:

    http://www.coburngreenbaum.com/news/reasonable_doubt.html

    I found it in one of the comments after reading at seamus oriley:
    http://seamusoriley.blogspot.com/2012/01/discerning-casey-anthony.htmlI

    I am not “obsessed” like I used to be about this murder case, but in between reading and watching other non-casey-anthony-related things on the computer (when my husband is not hogging the computer), I stil look around, trying to see if I can make any sense whatsoever as to why this murderer was not convicted, coz her and her attorneys have a mockery of children who really are sexually abused and used THIS “abuse-excuse” to get off of a murder charge.

  45. LindaNewYork ~~I read at your first link but not all of the article. It was very lenghty but I got their drift. Yes, there were mistakes made in the trial and not only by the prosecution. I think Judge Perry should have taken more time in picking the jurors. I realize that both time and money were issues but when you have to reach into the bottom of the barrel to fill a jury panel, then you have to expect what we saw. Maybe something can be learned from all this and the state and judges will sit up and take notice of this travesty of justice.

    BTW, the second link did not work properly but thanks for your efforts and info.

  46. LindaNewYork says:

    YES! It was a long article and I jumped in the shower and read it in 2 parts. LOL.
    I had also felt that the upcoming July 4th Holiday had a lot to do with the “speedy verdict”. And I hope in the future attorney’s defending murderers are not allowed to put forth a perposterous story/lie, accusing someone of raping his daughter and disposing of a deceased little girl with absoulutely no proof of such things.

    From the article:
    “When you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.” — Sherlock Holmes

    Try to finish it!

    Have a great Sunday!

    http://seamusoriley.blogspot.com/2012/01/discerning-casey-anthony.html

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